Sex Addict

"Floyd, I don't think you understand where I'm at. You're confusing a normal person who wants sex and a sex addict"

"ok" I say, "which one do you think that I think you are?"

"A normal person who wants sex"

"Yeah, that's what you are."

"No I'm not, I'm a sex addict!"

My friend Ned got in trouble with his wife because he woke her up in the middle of the night and wanted to have sex but she told him no, but he did it anyway. She said it was rude. I thought that was an understatement.

The issue is deeper than that. This guy loves his wife, he really does. I know what he did was a selfish and inexcusable act, but he really loves her. She's a good looking lady and he says that every time he sees her he wants sex. "Floyd, she turns me down 10 times a day, everyday". I believe him. He isn't a pervert, he isn't into all kinds of weird sex stuff, he just loves his wife and thinks she's the most gorgeous creature he's ever seen and wants to do it with her...all the time.

She isn't that into it. She has sex with him sometimes, I'd guess once a week at the most, but well within normal amounts for most married people. His perspective though is that it doesn't hurt her to have sex, and it helps him, so if she loved him she ought to be willing to help him out. Just like he would be willing to rub her back several times a week if it were sore.

Ned is convinced that he is abnormal, but everything he's told me sounds very similar to what I've heard from a lot of other guys and what I've personally experienced to be true. If I had sex with my wife as often as I wanted to I'd have to quit my day job.

What is a missionary?

Luke and I are chatting about whether or not we get burnt out on work sometimes and would like to do something else. So I told Luke that I do get tired of ministry and I'm planning on moving to Turkey to do missionary work.

"There's one problem I have with missionaries" he tells me. "Why do you have to go over there when we already have lots of problems here in America to fix?" I get this all the time. I always want to say, "It's because of people like YOU, who would never think of leaving your comfortable life here to go help someone who seems different from you!" I said something like that, but nicer.

"So what do missionaries do anyway? Build houses for poor people?" It seemed like an ironic question to me because at the moment I was sitting in a bar trying to tell people about Jesus which is pretty much the same thing I'd be doing as a missionary. So I used the window to lay it out for this guy. "I'd go to a bar in Turkey and get to know people and use the relationship to convince them that they have offended God with the mistakes they've made in life but that he has made an offer to forgive them through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ". He looks at me for a moment and says, "Oh, yeah, yeah, I get it"...I don't think he got it.

Drunken boasting is bizarre

Two guys were playing pool last night. I know them both vaguely and one of them was reasonably drunk. He comes of to me and slightly slurs, "I'm going to hustle this guy, he doesn't know it but I'm a pretty good pool player." So I told him, "they guy your playing hasn't lost yet tonight". He wasn't the best pool player I'd ever seen, but he did a reasonable job of beating everyone else. Drunken friend replies, "well we'll just have to change that."

Drunken friend didn't win.